I am on day three of forty for my journaling assignment for Lent and I’m ready to throw in the towel. I don’t have anything I am feeling particularly motivated or inspired to write about. I just got back from a great time of ministry but I just don’t have anything in me, except maybe a nap.
So why am I doing this again? Why am I blogging every day? Oh that’s right, Lent. A time of repentance. A time of intentionally focusing on Jesus Christ and his death for me. A time to give up something because I want to, because I love and appreciate Jesus Christ and to help me focus on what matters leading up to Easter. But you know what I just realized? I was blessed to be able to do all of that today. I was blessed to share with a few hundred women God’s grace thru Christ’s sacrifice and I think in some ways I am missing the point. The point of Lent is not to punish myself. I’ll be honest I have been dreading blogging today because I was gone until four and I’m tired. But God does not want our “sacrifices” out of obligation and He certainly doesn’t want me to do anything begrudgingly. Ministering today was the highlight of my day and in doing so I was able to not only focus on Christ and His death and love for me, I was able to tell others about it too.
“Dear Lord, I’m tired. I love speaking but I always feel like I got hit by a small truck afterwards. Thank you that you know my heart and that you don’t love me any less because I did not want to blog today. Thank you that you don’t love me anymore because I shared you with others today. Thank you for your unconditional love and thank you for your grace in my life. Help me to remember to serve you always out of a heart of gratitude and joy and not obligation. In Your Name, Amen.”